January 5, 2008

Admission of Guilt

I am the most hippy dippy, crunchy granola, loving & compassionate chick who rescues spiders, lives green, recycles everything, believes in karma, actually practices random acts of kindness, laughs all the way to the bank on purpose, is open hearted, always searching to do the greatest good, and seriously wouldn't hurt a fly.

But I admit it. Each day as I walk to my car, I deliberately step on the snails on the sidewalk, hearing the crunch of the shell under my foot, grinding all my hatred into that one slimy little body as I mutter under my breath, "Shiva, May you be reborn in your highest form and may you have been a lawyer in your past life." I tell ya, lawyers & snails keep me from reaching enlightenment this time around.

Got any good lawyer jokes for me?